Friday, December 19, 2008

Blogs are useless if you don't write on them. I looked up best fight scenes ever on youtube, and here is a small selection of what I found.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Why I won't see Repo! The Genetic Opera in theatres

1) Darren Lynn Bousman is a terrible director. Between the three Saw films he made and hearing stories from people that worked with him, its official that he needs to stop inhaling gas fumes before going to set.

2) A film is not a cult movie when you set out to make a cult movie. A real cult movie is a film that develops a following independent of the media or the film makers. It grows on its own. Its an organic, living thing. Making terrible casting choices on purpose in order to develop that WTF mentality is not a correct course of action. You can't tell people your film is cult film. That's just not how it works.

3) There is no three.

Granted, I will see it when it comes out on video. I am still a horror fan and will watch anything and everything, regardless of how bad I may think it will be. Sometimes I am surprised. Sometimes I'm not. But I won't participate in the cult marketing strategy they've got mapped out for Repo! Its trendy bullshit masked as a cult goth film.

On a lighter note, this is frickin' amazing.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Things that have impressed me

While I get rather annoyed anytime someone blows their load over the RED ONE, I was impressed with some of the press release regarding their two new camera's in development, the Scarlett and the Epic. While it essentially makes the RED ONE obsolete, and the 2009/2010 release dates means that by 2015 you should be able to actually shoot and post something with 'few' problems, the 28K Epic tickled my fancy, if only because it allows you to shoot in a native aspect ration of 2.35:1. No anamorphic lenses, no cropping of the image, the sensor is the exact size of a pristine cinematic widescreen image. I'm sure it will be beautiful, if they ever get it working.

I'm pretty worked up about Red Cliff 2. I really enjoyed the first part, and after ended, I immediately wanted to see the 2nd, which I imagine is filled with a whole lot of carnage, naval battles and good old fashioned John Woo swordplay.

Things that haven't impressed me

Couture vs Lesnar. Randy flopped like a fish. And if he didn't flop, well, he just plain stinks.

I saw the Star Trek trailer, and it looks like the O.C. in outer space. Why does J.J. Abrams suck my balls? I'm not too sure, but that guy from Heroes playing Spock is looks like he ate one too many paint chips as a child. Someone should just put him and his crappy show out of its misery.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

I hate computers. I did enjoy Nuit Blanche though.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Celluloid Virus?

Between sleeping 3-4 hours a night, going to kung fu, eating lots of crap and getting wacked out of mind a few times, going to TIFF wore me out. Even when it was over, I still didn't sleep, and didn't really rest, and eventually my body gave out. I got sick. I dad to take a day off of work, and even now, a week and a half later, I'm still sporting a sore throat. I know pity me, watching 30 or so movies over the course of 10 days is a hard life. But it got me thinking. What if I didn't wear my body out. What if I caught something from watching so much cinema, somekind of celluloid virus.

It's transmitted through sight. Somehow, much like Sadako and her transmission through videotape, this virus can only be transmitted when the image is projected on a screen. From there, the viral photons enter you retina, which is of course the most vulnerable part of the human body, giving the virus direct access to your brain. It quickly enters the nervous system, disrupting it, and spreads like wild fire through the body via the blood stream. Soon, the celluloid virus has a grip on you, 'le grip' as the French call it, and you collapse from exaustion. Your cells are forced into a repetitive cycle of viewing their own replication an infinite number of times, until they give out. The endoplasmic reticulum collapses. Your mitochondria become disrupted. There is no mitosis, or miosos, or osmosis. DNA and RNA form into one chain of mutated horror. The RDNA. If you don't get bed rest, you will die.

There is no cure. So please give generously to the celluloid virus fund. For inquiries, please email

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Robots prevail?

A common misconception about film is that its the perfect medium for robots. They can sit, for days on end, no need to eat, sleep, or urinate. They can watch a James Bond marathon without even blinking, and yet for a normal human being, that would be almost impossible to complete. Very few people could endure both the feat of physical endurance it takes to watch 40 odd hours of film and even fewer could sit through that much Pierce Brosnan and live to tell about it.

But there is a flaw with this mode of thinking. Yes robots have infinite patience and endurance, and many have the intellect to analyze a film on many levels in a nano-second, dissecting it, computing numerous theories about it's meaning and its cinematic audacity, or lack there of it. However, robots don't have feelings. They don't have the capacity to experience films on a visceral level. They may know the meaning behind a film, and they may understand that the structure of editing contrasted with the musical score and cinematic style is suppose to elicit a certain response from the viewer, but they can't feel that response, and therefore, cannot understand the true power of film. The power to move people.

Robots, in the end, loose.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Still tired

The film festival ended two days ago and I'm still tired. I planned poorly. I went to most of the midnight madness films, getting home between 3 and 4 am each night. I would then be sitting in the theatre again by 9:30 the next morning. I had three nights in one week where I had only 3 hours sleep. By friday, I was in a daze. Everything became a blur. Days didn't exist anymore, as I would sleep a few hours at night, then maybe an hour or two in the day. It was just one continuous mash of film, food and power naps. But I miss it.

I miss films that make me have a physical reaction. I saw quite a few of them, and I think that's what draws me to horror films most. If they are told well, you will have a physical reaction. You may hate the movie, you may love the movie, but you will feel the movie.

JCVD - I cried. It was amazing. Thats all I need to say.

Detroit Metal City - While the message of the film is uber- cheesey, two things make this a comic gem. The first is Ken’ichi Matsuyama's performance as Soichi Negishi, which is completely over the top and utterly breathtaking. The second is Toshio Lee's direction, which transforms the repetitive stream of jokes into an original blend of hilarity and insanity.

Sauna - A brooding, existential finnish horror film from the director of Jade Warrior, it is deeply unsettling, and the ending will stay with you long after you exit the theatre.

Hunger - Visual artist Steve McQueen's take on Bobby Sands hunger strike while imprisoned by the British during the reign of Margeret Thatcher. Visual amazing. Fassbinders performance is terrific. The static long take of Fassbinder and Liam Cunningham as Father Moran discussing the ramifications of such a hunger strike is a thing of beauty.

Daytime Drinking - A Korean indie film about a guy that goes out to the country to meet his friends and get drunk, only to discover his friends won't be showing up. He spends his days wandering the countryside, drinking lots, getting into antics with the locals. This is probably the biggest surprise I saw at the festival. It was very very funny.

Vinyan - Like Sauna, another unsettling film that will stick with you long after you leave the theatre. I loved Du Welz previous film Calvaire, and Vinyan is just as effective a film. The cinematography is stunning, and established Benoit Debie, who also shot Calvaire and Irreversible as one of my favourite cinematographers.

Martyrs - I could say a lot about Martyrs, but I won't. I loved it. I loved every minute, every second. It will offend a lot of people. It holds nothing back. But it is an incredible experience. The less you know about the film the better. It starts like any other revenge tale, the heroine killing the people that kidnapped and tortured her, but then it goes places you couldn't possibly imagine. Places that will upset and disturb you. This is the kind of film that makes living worthwhile, and makes me remember why I love cinema.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008


Its day 6 at the festival, and I think I've finally gotten sick of the whole, piracy, pirates, rrrrrrrrrrr routine. It was funny last year. It's funny at a midnight madness when everyone does it. But at every single screening, it really becomes annoying and not very funny at all, although I'm sure the person doing it thinks he/she is frickin' hilarious, and not just a jackass.

On a more important note, JCVD is still the best thing I've seen. Although Vinyan, Sauna, Hunger and Still Walking are all equally amazing, they just didn't have the same emotional impact that JCVD did. Although the ending of all four does really stick with you.

Friday, September 05, 2008


I'm still in shock from my viewing of JCVD last night. It will be hard to see a film at TIFF this year that is better than this. But hopefully I will be pleasantly surprised. But could a film starring Jean Claude Van Damme as himself really be that good? Yes, its that good.
From the 5 minute, one take, opening action scene to the tear jerking climatic 7 minute monologue, Jean Claude delivers. The film works not only because the acting is top notch, the script and direction clever and original, and not only because you identify and empathize with Jean Claude in the movie, but also because you empathize with Jean Claude the man. And while this is indeed his comeback movie, this could be the peak of his serious acting career. Maybe.
You see, during that monologue, which he wrote himself, and which he literally pours he real heart and soul into, he isn't so much acting, as he is giving a candid diatribe about the ups and downs of his life, addressing not a character in the film but the audience directly. Its sort of like those reality show monolgues when people breakdown, spewing their guts, crying, venting. While there are ALOT of comparisons between this and 'Being John Malkovich', it should be noted that it also shares ALOT in common with 'Funny Games', from the breaking of narrative as Jean Claude speaks to the audience, down to the cathartic action ending that we are quickly denied. And while this makes THIS movie amazing, it maybe hard for Jean Claude to capture that same emotion that he did here. Its easy for him to play himself as long as he holds nothing back, but if it comes down to playing someone else, well, that remains to be seen.

Monday, September 01, 2008

Fan Expo 98

Namor, champion of the sea. He was one of many engaging characters at the Fan Expo last weekend. My companion Gregory, Duke of Yorke, featured in the above photo, was captured with a plethora of our costumed friends.

There was of course everyone`s favourite Star Wars character, Porkins. Greg insisted on having his picture taken with every Star Wars character we saw. We never got our hands on a Darth Vader, and we had to chase down the lone Han Solo, but I think the crowning achievement of the expo was Porkins. I mean, that guy actually looks like Porkins!

There was a variety of Jokers at the expo. Most tried in vain to emulate Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight. Some, like the one above, weren`t too bad. Others smeared a bit of make-up on their faces, thinking that if its messy it some how captures the spirit of the Joker. Wrong. Most were crap.

And then there were banana`s.
The costumes were great. The expo, well, was a little disappointing. Yes, it was immense. Yes, there were A LOT of vendors, A LOT of things to look at, and A LOT of guests, but, at with vendors such as Zellers, and Blockbuster selling, well, things they normally sell, I wonder whats the point. Whats the point of selling DVD`s, anime and manga that you can get any day of the week for the same price. Besides a sale or two, what the vendors sold really wasn`t any different from what they normally sell. I was hoping for something rare, or some great deals. I did get a good deal from Cinema One, who was selling Tartan`s DVD`s for $8.99, so I got a bunch, but thats only because Tartan went belly up, not because Cinema One was doing something different from what they normally do. I wanted to find rare and exotic manga, but all I saw was the same old Naruto, Death Note and Lone Wolf and Cub.
On a side note, one of the highlights was trying out Wii Fit, which has now jumped up on my list of things to get for my Wii. It was frickin`sweet.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

I've hurt my wrist and spent the morning puking up nachos and salsa fries. So far a good day. The last three movies I've seen in theatres are Zohan, Pineapple Express and Tropic Thunder, and all three got progressively funnier. Well, maybe not. I went into Zohan with no expectations, and it did make me giggle in parts. Pineapple Express and Tropic Thunder I thought were comic gold. I laughed alot. Then threw up. Maybe theres a link.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Olympic Inspiration?

I've been taking kung fu at Golden Harmony since March now (I think), and it is a truly amazing place, not only because Sifu Harvey is an incredible person with a ridiculous amount of knowledge to pass on, but also because of the people and the atmosphere.

I've been feeling for the last few weeks like I'm getting back, at least physically, to the place I was last year before I hurt my foot. In fact, I think, because of the change of diet and lifestyle, even more so. My endurance has definetly improved, and mentally, I feel much more focused. I do find myself out of breathe occassionally when we do more aerobic activity, but I imagine that goes hand in hand with smoking weed. Which, I am trying to minimize these days so that I don't find myself out of breathe.

But this brings me to the Olympics. Because of work, it's hard sometimes to make it to 3-4 kung fu classes a week. I'm trying to keep it at 3 classes minimum, but it's hard. I know I need to branch out into other activities, because nothing helps to get you into better shape than cross training. Your body won't grow stagnant performing the same routine day in and day out. Body confusion all the way. I started swimming again last year, but the pool down the street is a yard pool, and, call me a swimming snob, but I find it hard to swim in a yard pool and take training seriously. It almost seems like cheating. Plus, I got sick of having people getting pissed off at me because I wouldn't be floating back and forth for 30 minutes but instead making waves and constantly swimming around them.

I've been looking at Masters Swimming, but between everything else in life, I'm not sure if I can commit to that. I need to find a pool, 25 metres long, sort of close to me, that isn't filled with old people and casual swimmers. Maybe I got spoiled by the indoor pool in Georgetown. Going to Adult Swim there was always filled with a few lanes of people that were actually there to train. What to do? I can run, but, nothing makes me happier than either swimming or kung fu. Running just don't cut it.

On a side note, Michael Phelps website is pretty funny. I never realized he made so many wonderful films!

Friday, August 01, 2008

I am the worlds laziest filmmaker. Not that I have a problem with that. I'm lazy when it comes to everything in life, not just make films, so I think its pretty acceptable. I'm even writing this blog a week and a half late. But thats not the point.

The point is, my short, 'Walter' screened at Drop Your Shorts, a local film festival held at the Revue Theatre here in Toronto every few months. It was a good time. It re-affirmed how much I enjoy watching a film I've made with an audience, now of this internet crap. Sure it gets you the widest audience these days unless you produce Hollywood drivel, but, as David Lynch said, "Films aren't meant to be played on a fucking phone." And I agree. More cinema please. Below is a link to Walter.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

I also happened to run into former Sim employee John Baxter, who had some work screened that night. His shining moment is below. Its spectacularly funny stuff. If you like zany, monty pythonesque stuff.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Fantasia 2008

Fantasia was pretty frickin' awesome. Four days wasn't nearly enough. I must return next year and stay longer, much longer.

A Colt is My Passport - Beautiful, stylish noir gangster thriller with Jo Shishido, it slowly builds to an amazing climax of bullets and cool.

X-Cross - Kinji Fukusaku made a decent movie. And while he still borrows heavily from western films, particularly the Wicker Man, he blends everything in such an original and mind bending way, that it turns into unique and enjoyable experience.

Shamo - One of two dissappoints of the festival. Wasn't nearly quite as brutal as I had hoped. It seemed very rushed, and turned out to be a jumbled mess. It did have its moments, but it just seemed like they tried to pack too much manga into one movie.

Shadows in the Palace - A brilliant period thriller, that starts off as a murder mystery in the royal palace, but eventually develops supernatural undertones. I was surprised how great, and bloody, it was.

Wicked Lake - One of the worst movies I've seen in a while. It was pointless and boring. Yes, there are lesbian witches, but that really isn't enough to make this film good. Bad acting. Horrendous cinematography (it really did look like a student film). Completely uninspired gore. I don't care if the guy from Ministry did the soundtrack, it still sucks my balls.

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane - This took me completely by surprise. I don't know what I was expecting, but man oh man, definetly one of the highlights of the festival. While placing it into the unconventional american horror bill sort of gave away the ending for me before I saw the movie, it is still a great piece of American cinema.

Chanbara Beauty - Zombies. A samurai girl dressed in a bikini and a cowboy hat. What more could you ask for. How about a finale between the samurai girl in question and her evil, treacherous sister that will blow your mind. If you can accept that its based on a video game, and just sit back and relax, you WILL be entertained.

Tokyo Gore Police - Surreal, bloody as hell, perverse, completely insane and completely brilliant. I loved every second.

Robo Rock - A band that sings about not eating fish. A man obsessed with a Robot that he believes was created by the Japanese government in the 1960's. He believes the singer of the fish band has the correct voice to control this robot. But does he believe in himself enough to make this come true? A hilarious and outrageous feel good movie.

Be A Man! Samurai School - Tak Sakaguchi's directorial debut, based on manga, that stays true to the manga spirit, with ridiculous characters, great fight scenes and an incredibly entertaining story. I was surprised that this was the first film he would direct, as it relies more on the comedy than the action, but hey, he is a self proclaimed Otaku who loves Akira Kurosawa.

Akanbo Shojo - A decent horror film that starts off great, but then falls apart towards the end when it trades tension and horror for the ludicrous. But, it does have a mutant baby with a giant clawed arm and some impressive scenes of bloody mayhem.

Trailer Park of Terror - Finally, a refreshing take on the dead in the water zombie genre. Its funny and bloody as hell. How can you go wrong with red neck zombies?

Thursday, July 03, 2008

Bonfire Night

July the fifth has come and gone but thoughts of it still linger,
I held a banger in my hand,
Had anyone seen my finger.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Millions of years old

In the dead of night, when we gaze up at the sea of stars above, what we are seeing is light, tens of millions of years old. It travels millions of light years across the universe, until it's finally absorbed by our optic centers. Now imagine what kind of insubstantial, deep space photons this light is carrying. Light that has traveled across the galaxy. Light that could be as old as the dinosaurs. Light that carries unknown properties, in minute amounts. Light that enters into our eye, into our brain, into our mind. Now imagine that you sit in a field, or some other area where the amount of light spilling from the urban landscape is at a minimum. You're out in the forest somewhere, far away from civilization. Its just you and the stars. Now imagine you lay in this field all night, not sleeping, but staring up at the stars. Now imagine you have a tent, and you sleep all day, and each night you gaze at the heavens above, absorbing the ancient light into your retina. Eventually, the cosmic rays will cause some kind of transformation. Right? The question is, how long will it take. How long will it take before the cosmic rays from the far reaches of the galaxy, carrying alien photons, change the structure of your brain, re-shaping your frontal lobe, causing you to develop incredible psychic powers. Imagine being able to control people with your mind! Imagine the power of crushing a person's heart with just a thought! Imagine what it means to be a true god of the universe! Feel the energy of this dimension and the next course through your veins!

Monday, June 16, 2008

Its official, 4th edition Dungeons and Dragons sucks my balls. Despite the fact that Wizards of the Coast say they are NOT trying to compete with WOW and it's ilk, its fairly obvious they are. It seems to be aimed at 13 year old boys who want to smash orcs. Well, I guess it was always aimed at 13 year old boys, but still, it held somekind of an attraction to older, more mature players. Not it seems the roleplaying aspect has diminished considerably. All the skills, feats and spells are far more combat specific. Anything that had strictly a roleplaying effect, with no relevance to combat has been completely removed. It either works in battle, or it ain't needed in the game. It seems they really want people to play this online. I mean, who really needs to talk to real people, when you can do it all online! While I do have friends who stick to 2nd Edition, I think I will stick with 3.5.

On a side not, "The Happening" wasn't really very good, although it would have made a great short film. And "Chocolate" was also a slight disappointment. Wasn't nearly as much ass kicking as I thought there was going to be. Plus, Jee Ja Yanin doesn't have the speed that Tony Jaa or Dan Chupong have. Yes, there is a great tribute to Jackie Chan during the factory fight scene, and it does pick up towards the end, but some of it is so uninspired and recycled from other, far better, Thai action films. Still, she does learn to fight by watching Ong Bak, which is kind of funny.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Being a competitive swimmer during my high school tenure, I have always been on the lookout for the perfect swimming movie.

And, alas, my dream has come true. Swimming. Japanese girls. Chainsaws. The undead. Nudity. And general mayhem. All rolled up into one wonderful film.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

Is cinema dead? Not the act of creating a film itself (and its subsequent release across thousands of screens Worldwide), but the narrative of cinema. The story and history of cinema itself. As cinema is an art, or at least has the potential to be an art, and the narrative of art is directly linked to the narrative of homo sapien's as a species, what happens when the story of humankind reaches an end? Or will the story of humankind ever really reach a conclusion?

Now unless I completely misinterpreted what Paul Schrader was saying in his article Film Canon, he sees humankind's narrative coming to an end in the next century, and therefore the end of the narrative of art itself. I, like David Bordwell am not quite as skeptical. I don't agree with the predicted speed or even the course of the great technological advancements that futurists Ray Kurweil and Joel Garreau have foreseen. The world in which they inhabit seems so far removed from reality, I find it hard to take serious. Have we become that egotistical that we believe we can remove ourselves that far from nature, and have the ability to have that much control over it?

I love William Gibson. I love Mamoru Oshii. And I love Masmune Shirow. But I see no sign of artificial intelligence or the end of a physical body for all conscious beings anytime soon. If Kevin Smith should be remembered for anything, it should be his hilarious short The Flying Car. Futurists in the 1950's thought we'd be colonizing Mars, and so far we've landed on the moon. Once. Maybe.

But I digress. Maybe because, as Schrader points out in the article, he has only 10 years left of film making in him, and therefore since the narrative of film is ending for him, it is ending for film itself. But I find the communal experience of going to the cinema far more enlightening than even watch a movie on my TV, let alone on my computer. Alienation is completely unnatural. We are social beings. Despite how easy it is to sit at home and play World of Warcraft, I gain far more pleasure playing Dungeons and Dragons because I interact with people face to face. However advanced the Internet may become, nothing can replace real human contact. It can be debated that the decline of our society and the rapid growth of mental and social problems can be linked to our growing lack of social interaction. There is a spiritual connection that exists between people in a theatre that cannot be replicated with 1's and 0's. It accesses a plane of consciousness beyond a computer's comprehension.

Do I think film as an art will change? Yes. I think it will become more interactive, but I think the cinema will always exist. But I also think that in 100 years, the world will be pretty much the same. I think we will people will be making short films about how the world is suppose to be filled with androids possessed with artificial intelligence, and all conscious beings will become ageless as our bodies cease to exist, but instead we still drive cars and take walks in the park. Well, maybe then, we will have flying cars.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

I should probably write on here more.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

A video I shot for the One Minute film and video festival.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Monday, January 21st

I purchase my ticket for the Rambo Marathon. They say it's one night
only. And I imagine they mean it. This will never happen again in the
history of the universe!

Thursday, January 24th

I leave work and head for the theatre formally known as the Paramount.

I take my seat. I have with me 2 bean burritos, 2 Guru iced honey green tea
drinks, 1 Aquafina + blackberry/grape, 1 almond fudge Cliff Bar and 1 Ruth's
ginger chocolate maca power bar.

First Blood begins as scheduled. No previews. No commercials. Just
straight to the film.

I realize that David Caruso is in this movie. Probably his best role ever.

The first and only kill of First Blood takes place when Bill McKinney falls
from the helicopter.

Credits roll. I run to the bathroom and ponder the film. It was great to
see First Blood on the big screen. While this, like all Rambo films,
features John Rambo taking on a vast number of men and defeating them
using guerilla tactics, First Blood has Stallone acting at his best. Say what
you will, people laughed at all points of the film, except for Stallone's speech
at the end when he breaks down and cries like a little girl.

I arrive back in my seat. I now have 1 cheese pizza, 2 Guru iced honey
green tea drinks and 1 Ruth's ginger chocolate maca power bar.

First Blood part 2 begins. Again right on schedule.

Rambo is given his mission. Yes, it happens just that fast. That's what
makes this the 2nd best Rambo movie. Which is why it's First Blood part 2.

The first kill. Shortly after that is the one and only kiss Rambo ever
receives. Another reason Rambo is such a great icon. The man is obviously

Credits roll. I take a walk to stretch my legs. First Blood part 2 aka
Rambo 2 definetly shows how the films evolved as the 80's progressed. It was
1985. Stallone had to begin competing with Schwartznegger at this point.
This was the same year that the green beret masterpiece Commando was
released, so Stallone had to really step up. And step up he did. The
explosive tipped arrows are a nice touch. And 69 confirmed kills as opposed
to First Bloods 1. But still, this is no Commando.

I arrive back at my seat. They are giving away Rambo dogtags to people who
saw First Blood in theatres. I take stock of my supplies. 1 Guru iced honey green
tea drink and 1 Ruth's ginger chocolate maca power bar.

Rambo 3 begins. 5 minutes late.

The first kill is made. Up until this point, Rambo 3 takes the prize for
most kills, at 132, and yet it takes the longest amount of time for the
killings to start. Most interesting.

Credits roll. I run to the bathroom and ponder the film. Its 1988 at this
point. Stallone was in a panic. He'd followed Rocky 4, with Over the Top
and Cobra. Schwartzneggar had Predator, Red Heat, the Running Man.
Rambo 3 didn't fare too well. Hence no Rambo until 20 years later. But, I will
give the film credit. The first 3 films do show an evolution of John Rambo
and flow together nicely.

I take my seat. I now have 1 poutine, 1 Guru iced honey green tea drink,
and 1 bottle of water.

Finally, Rambo 4 begins. Oh, wait, no it doesn't. They show previews for
the remake of the Eye (which shows every possible spoiler and twist for the
film in the preview) and something else that was pretty forgettable.

Rambo begins.

The first kill. This new Rambo film doesn't mess around. 236 kills.
Although, this first kill isn't Rambo killing people. Many of the kills
aren't. This is the Burmese at their worst. And I do mean their worst.
This movie didn't work for me mostly because it doesn't fit with the other
three at all. The tone of it is completely different. In the first
three, they at least tried to humanize some of the bad guys. Tried to make
them somewhat likeable. Not in this film. The Burmese are depicted as pure
evil. The movie is basically an ad for the invasion of Myanmar.

The credits roll. I stumble out of the theatre. So much blood. The ending
of Rambo is a sight to behold. Really. Its utterly ridiculous. Rambo
marathon a complete success. The best night of my life.

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

This Christmas I peed my pants.